I just glanced over my previous entry and have to laugh. Oooh, that seems like such a long time ago. That somewhat girlfriend of mine, Kayla? We broke up after three days, at my demand. She was just too much for me to handle and not as attractive as I tried to convince myself she was. That relationship did NOT work out in the least for me.
Then, I finally got up the nerve to tell my closest friend that I have huge feelings for her, right? It even seemed hopeful that she would like me back and I’d get myself a girlfriend I’d be happy and mostly content with; didn’t happen. She turned me down and I was depressed over it for a bit. I didn’t let it last for very long though. To get myself over it, I spent this whole weekend out with friends – a form of distraction at first, but then just an honest fun time with my besties. I truly do love them to death.
Right now I’m actually stressed out though. Having fun with my friends all the time is beyond wonderful but now I have an english essay due tomorrow for a midterm grade aaaand I have done next to nothing on it, even though I’ve known it would be due for . . . awhile. I now have less than four hours to complete it and then I have to work on missing assignments from Anthropology, as well. But hopefully I can get that done tomorrow and then I’ll be good to hang with friends over the weekend. I dearly hope! Well okay, hoping isn’t good enough. I need to tell myself that that is exactly what I’m going to do tomorrow; I’m going to get home after school and put my ass to the assignments so that I can get them done with. Maybe I could even work late into tonight on the missing assignments, then I can go to Ashleigh Rinker’s birthday party tomorrow! Yeeeah! I’ll try to get those assignments done tonight. If I don’t get them totally finished, I’ll just do them . . . during second block tomorrow, that way I can still hop in the car with Brandon after school!
But seriously, I need to get myself straightened out. I’ve barely been skating by and it isn’t going to get any easier to manage next semester, given that I’ll be replacing elective courses with core classes. I need to take on the responsibility of my workload more seriously. I pride myself on being an intelligent person who has to be in advanced courses but if I can’t take the time to put in the effort, I’m only contradicting myself. It’s pathetic!
I need to smack myself into shape here!
xx~Ria
LOL @ “I need to get myself straightened out”